Why is the idea of flirting so intimidating? For most of us it is. Maybe we fear looking slutty or invoking the wrath of other females. Or maybe we've just been out of the dating scene for too long. These are some easy ways to flirt without appearing 'desperate', 'slutty', 'silly,' or any other derogatory word you can come up with. Not dating? That's okay. All men like it when his woman flirts with him--give it a try!
- Be expressive. Be the kind of woman who isn't afraid to express her opinions, laugh out loud, or dance with her friends. Showing a man that you're bold in your feelings about life can attract his attention and make him want to get to know you.
- Radiate confidence. This goes right along with the above. Self-assurance is an aphrodisiac when done in a genuine--not a 'look at me'--way. People glow when they feel good about themselves and that's sexy!
- Be open. When you have inviting body language--appearing warm and friendly--he'll find you much more approachable. Open body language is inviting and sends the right message so he knows you're interested.
- Touch him. No, I'm not talking about groping him. I'm talking about a gentle touch on the forearm or hand to reinforce a point.
- Give him openeners for conversation. Men can get stuck trying to figure out how to talk to you--yes, they are humans, too--so give him a break by handing him some topics like something from the news that he'd know about unless he's been sequestered in a cave, the venue you're at, the drink you're drinking, or anything that could get the conversation going rather than stalling.
- Compliment him. Men like to know what you find appealing about them so go ahead, don't be shy. Who doesn't like a compliment? Complimenting a guy is a great way to flirt without giving up your power. When you give a compliment, it shows that you are confident enough to make someone else feel good about themselves. Not only will this make the man feel more secure around you, you'll also appear more self-confident, which we've already decided is a good thing. Just don't be slutty in your compliment--keep it classy.
- Ask him questions. Asking questions shows that you're interested in knowing him better. Listen to his answers and use them to ask more questions. People like to know they are being heard and that you're paying attention.
- Make eye-contact and then look away. Hold a glance a few seconds longer than necessary and then look away. This is called the silent flirt. It makes him wonder what you're thinking. No need to wink or lick your lips or anything tacky because that will have the opposite effect!
- Be an actual lady. Contrary to what you've been told about being 'one of the guys', men are truly attracted to feminine qualities. Save the tomboy, sporty attitude for later when you're doing things--no need to turn that off, but a balance goes a long way to attracting a man. Keep it sweet and simple. Show him you have manners so that he won't be embarrassed taking you to meet his coworkers…or his parents.
- Flip your hair. This move worked in 6th grade and it still works today. Flipping your hair or toying with it is a classic flirtatious move that shows a man you're flirting with him. Men find the feminine aspects of your appearance irresistible.
- Mimic his movements. If he's leaning forward in his chair, do the same. When you're mirror the movements of someone you're interested in, it sends the signal that you're on the same wavelength.
- Suggest hanging out sometime. The words 'hanging out' or less intimidating than asking him for an actual date. For example, if he says he's really into surfing or skiing, say something about how you've always wanted to learn or, if you're an expert, say how you'd like to go sometime.
- Smile. I've saved the best for last. Smiling is your best feature (unless you don't have teeth, in which case, I suggest a dentist). It's the easiest, most effective way to flirt and anyone can do it! It's also noncommittal--you could be just being friendly or remembering something funny from earlier--in case he doesn't flirt back.
Keep on being sexy!
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